Our Mom Taught Us A Lot Of Things -- Sometimes Silently

Thanks, Moms, For Teaching Us Silent Lessons 

             There are 7.6 billion people on the planet and yet each one of us feels unique and special.  How do we come to realize that?  Because God sent us moms. 

   Moms show us love and tell us we’re special.  But, just as importantly, they teach us silent lessons. 

             Here are three silent lessons I learned because my mom lived them:      

1.    It’s never too late, and you’re never too old.

 Late in life my mother returned to a small community school in Broken Bow Oklahoma to get her GED. My sister and I were adults and she and dad were retired when she was awarded that diploma.  “It’s never too late” she silently taught me.

 2.    You can go through hell and not be bitter or broken.

  My mother endured years of abuse from her father. She also went through The Great Depression and her family survived by selling bootleg liquor from a still in the backwoods. Those two experiences alone would be enough to make anyone resentful and mean.  But the only effect I saw was that mom kept plastic containers to re-use and recycle before recycling was the thing to do.

Instead of bitterness or brokenness, I saw grace and thankfulness birthed out of poverty and rejection.  She silently taught me: “You can go through hell and not be bitter or broken.”

3.    You can give 100% to God, your husband, your children and yourself and still have love to give.

My mother was a strong Christian, pastor’s wife, mother of two children, and she took care of herself by dealing with the effects of abuse at age 68.

In the middle of showing me how to balance different roles without sacrificing one for the other, she silently taught me: “The more you love, the more love grows” 

What did your mother silently teach you and how did that impact your life?

 I’ll tell you how those silent lessons made a difference in MY life:

 1.     I went back to school late in life. I continue to learn and can say with my mom, “it’s never too late and you’re never too old.

 2..     When the doctor kept saying “We’ll be lucky if all she loses is her leg; it’s cancer,” she had silently taught me not to give up.  And even after 10 surgeries and going through my own personal hell of surgery, recovery, and months in a wheelchair, my mother’s silent lesson taught me: “You can go through hell and not be bitter or let life break you.”

 3.     I’ve been a Christian most of my life, I have a long lasting marriage and  my son is a man to be proud of (which I’m taking partial credit for J)   I too have learned , “the more you love, the more love grows.”

 Out of 7.6 billion people, I am unique and special.  Out of 7.6 billion people, you are unique and special. 

And we have our moms to thank for teaching us silent lessons        

I Remember the Bad..............And It Helps

I remember the bad……… and it helps

   When you are knocked to your knees by things you didn’t see coming or that you were unprepared to handle, don’t let that fate become your future. 

There have been times when, looking back over the year, I’d “count my many blessings and name them one by one.”

Not this year.  This year I cried.  A lot.  This year I felt discouraged.  Many times.  This year I had to keep giving myself a pep talk to “practice what you preach” about gratitude, faith and believing.

Our son has been through 10 months of hell with severe back pain, stomach issues, weird problems with thyroid issues – and he no longer even has a thyroid.  If you’ve ever walked with a loved one through such torment, you know it drains you, frustrates and annoys you, because you can’t help.  They’re suffering, and because they are, you are.  Yes, that’s where I’ve been.  

Then I remember the bad…….. and it helps.

“Why?”  you might ask.

Because when I remember other bad times and other terrible situations I’ve been through, when I reflect on others’ pain and that they’ve somehow made it, I’m encouraged to believe I can too.    

 I remember when I was bed-ridden for almost a year, in severe pain, unable to work, clean my house or cook.  And yet, even though it seemed to stretch into eternity, I did recover, and returned to work and life. 

I remember bad days when my husband seemed to be wasting away in front of our eyes and no one could decide if he had Lyme’s disease or some other debilitating horror.  It was a very bad year.  However, he came back stronger than ever and now, when others are taking it easy, he bounds up stairs in a way younger men would envy.   

I remember my niece hearing those dreaded words, “if you have family. you need to say your good-byes.”  That was not a good Easter season.  Nevertheless, that same year at Christmas, she gleefully checked off a bucket-list item and waded into the Pacific Ocean for the first time ever. 

I remember the bad…….. and it helps.

I saw a quote the other day that read like this:  “On particularly rough days, I like to remind myself that my track record for getting through bad days so far is 100% and that’s pretty good.” 

Yes, I remember the bad days.  And it helps. I celebrate because life seems even more precious now.  When you have bad days or a bad year, remember you’ll get through them.   As the old saying goes:  “What does not kill us makes us stronger.”   Bill Johnson once talked about Faith being both a Gift and a Fruit, and fruit can grow.   Perhaps ironically, it seems the prime growing season for Faith is in bad times.

 That’s why I remember the bad…….. and it helps.

If this has been a great year of counting your blessings, I celebrate with you!  However, if you say, “this was not a good year,” I encourage you to remember:  this too shall pass.

When you are knocked to your knees by things you didn’t see coming or that you were unprepared to handle, don’t let that fate become your future.  Get back up.  

And sometimes if you remember the bad you’ve been through…..it will help.